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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I ordered one of those Tempura mattresses. Way too crunchy.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

You can just enjoy kombucha. You don’t need to go on a tirade about cleansing your gut.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

26 minutes ago

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Just shared via Pinterest:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Just shared via Slack:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Trending via Instagram:

Finally it’s Friday and I can go out. I’m putting the garbage out and I’ll be right back.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If we’re not supposed to be snacking late at night why is there a light in the fridge?

Just shared via Instagram:

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Replying to all emails with “ya think?”.

Seen just now on Slack:

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Spotted on Slack:

I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Home » Funny Behavior Quotes

118 Funny behavior quotes

Funny behavior quotes highlight the quirky, unpredictable, and downright bizarre ways we humans act — often without even realizing it! 😂🕺 Whether it’s talking to pets like they’re people, pretending to be normal in public, or hitting “reply all” by accident, these quotes remind us that our behavior is a constant source of comedy. Because let’s face it — weird is the new normal! 😆🙃🎭

New funny behavior quotes 👇

1 day ago
Share →: I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Commentary:
When they say "adult supervision required," apparently that's just a suggestion! 😂🚶‍♂️🧩
3 days ago
Share →: Applying lip balm when you know someone’s watching you is a power move.

Commentary:
Who knew moisturizing could feel like wielding a tiny stick of confidence? 💄😎✨
5 days ago
Share →: Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

Commentary:
🌿👀 "Scrolling with maturity but those eyebrows have a mind of their own" 😅🧐
7 days ago
Share →: Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Commentary:
Silence: the greatest gift, and it's budget-friendly too! 😂🤐✨
1 week ago
Share →: Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Commentary:
Proof that sometimes less is more… especially when avoiding a novel! 😂📜✂️
1 week ago
Share →: On the internet, you can be anything you want. It’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.

Commentary:
When the internet hands you the option to be a wizard, but you choose a rubber chicken instead 🤦‍♂️🐔✨
1 week ago
Share →: May life treat you exactly the same way you treat servers, store clerks, senior citizens, children, and animals.

Commentary:
Karma's got a clipboard, and it's taking notes! 📝😅🐶👶
1 week ago
Share →: If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Commentary:
Guess I’ll have to hide my happiness behind my resting grump face then! 😄🙃
1 week ago
Share →: My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Commentary:
Cart collector in training 🛒😂 Just call me the window shopping champion! 🏆✨
1 week ago
Share →: The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

Commentary:
I guess they didn't have "train-ing" for that back then! 🚂😱😂

For even more funny behavior quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny behavior quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

26 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m probably like this because I drank water from the hose.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Making waves on WeChat:

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Trending via Reddit:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Just shared via Slack:

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

Seen just now on Twitch:

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Reported on WeChat:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Seen just now on YouTube:

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

Shared recently on Instagram:

If chickens knew how good they tasted, they would understand.

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