Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

And no thanking Jesus unless he actually shows up at the ceremony.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Rock bottom ain’t even that bad of a place to be if you’re into collecting rocks.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Be the funny, awkward silence breaker you want to see in the world.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Can someone come over and take this phone away from me?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Can’t be sexting when you’re somewhat articulate. You just sound like a vampire.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,415

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

Shared recently on Telegram:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Yes, I sometimes put my cell phone down. Especially when it rings.

Just shared via Messenger:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Just shared via Slack:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Freshly posted on X:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

222 Funny behavior quotes

Funny behavior quotes highlight the quirky, unpredictable, and downright bizarre ways we humans act — often without even realizing it! 😂🕺 Whether it’s talking to pets like they’re people, pretending to be normal in public, or hitting “reply all” by accident, these quotes remind us that our behavior is a constant source of comedy. Because let’s face it — weird is the new normal! 😆🙃🎭

New funny behavior quotes 👇

Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

16 minutes ago

90, animal, animal behavior, around, behavior, companionship, daily, daily life, dog, following, humor, life, living, living with pet, mouth, owner, pet, pet owner, watching, wondering
Calling the police when someone unfollows.

57 minutes ago

behavior, calling, digital, humor, internet, joke, media, online, online behavior, police, satire, social, social media, someone, unfollow
Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.

3 hours ago

apology, bad, bad behavior, behavior, Gatorade, humor, joking, Mercury, playful, quirky, sarcasm, science, science humor, sorry, whatever
My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

4 hours ago

accident, animal, animal behavior, behavior, bird, clumsiness, flying, humor, self-deprecating, spirit, spirit animal, unconscious, window, Windows
Why is everyone so chill about parrots being able to talk? That’s a whole animal. Talking.

4 hours ago

able, animal, animal behavior, behavior, being, chill, everyone, humor, parrot, talk, talking, whole, why
The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

5 hours ago

behavior, dehumanizing, eat, eating, food, humor, men, nothing, relationship, short, single
I’d rather you don’t watch me while I’m liking my own post.

6 hours ago

behavior, humor, ID, liking, liking post, me, media, own, post, privacy, self-love, social, social media, social media behavior, watch
I don’t think anything good will ever happen again until people feel bad about being stupid again.

8 hours ago

again, anything, bad, behavior, being, ever, feel, frustration, good, happen, human, human behavior, humor, i, motivation, people, pessimism, self-awareness, stupid, stupidity, think
If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

8 hours ago

behavior, funny idea, giant, giant house, house, humor, idea, keys, own, ownership, people, perception, social, social behavior, think
There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

9 hours ago

addiction, behavior, car, cars, dependence, distraction, epidemic, funny observation, just, life, observation, parked, parked car, people, phone, phone addiction, phones, social, social behavior, staring, technology, technology dependence, urban, urban life

For even more funny behavior quotes, hit next 👇

All funny behavior quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Reddit this month:

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

83 shares on Instagram this month:

How long do you actually have to wear a muscle shirt until you get muscles?

42 shares on Instagram this month:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I would love to see AI be unemployed.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

A few months after the wedding, Cinderella’s husband began to complain about her having too many shoes.

33 shares on Slack this month:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

Polish girls are just winter Latinas.

63 shares on Twitch this month:

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

86 shares on Telegram this month:

There is a giant spider on my dash so I’m going to have to buy a new car now.

95 shares on Snapchat this month:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here talking baby talk to my plants.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Asian girl at tech company: Wow, everyone here is so friendly.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s funny how it’s often easier to access academic resources illegally, even when you have university library access.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,665

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Billionaires are so weird. What are you saving up for? Hell?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Please take your Apple Watch off if you are wearing a dress or formal attire. You look like a spy kid.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

How does pasta water know when you’re not looking?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

To save money, you really just gotta stay at home.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

For Halloween, I’m going as an emotional roller coaster.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

If you talk about astrology, and no one stops you, it means you must be incredibly pretty.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

Breaking via Twitch:

Eating Halloween candy and putting up my Christmas tree because nothing matters anymore.

Freshly posted on X:

I’m gonna dress how I want this summer, and if you think I’m fat, well, so do I.

Going viral on Threads:

My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Breaking via Instagram:

Welcome to your 40s… you can now use this as an excuse not to help a friend move.

Spotted on Reddit:

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

Making waves on Reddit:

Do people still actually eat 3 meals a day, or do we all just survive off of stress and iced coffee?

Shared recently on Discord:

That masculine urge to completely avoid relationships until you get your life together.

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