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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Why trust atoms? Because they’ve never been caught fibbing, just fission.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

I actually check my emails every day in hopes I’m going to get some life-changing news someday.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Those astronauts that just landed? They should be greeted by chimpanzees on horses.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Jan 7, 2026

3,704

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Going viral on WeChat:

Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Some people find it strange when you talk to your pet. I find conversations with some people much stranger.

Shared recently on Discord:

Not only is Santa not real, there are also no horny singles in your area wanting to meet you.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.

Just shared via Threads:

Millionaires and multi-billion dollar companies be like, “We’re doing our part by asking the poor to donate to the poor.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a few minutes.

Making waves on Reddit:

Do you ever restart the dryer because you don’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Funny delight quotes

Funny delight quotes bring a burst of joy and laughter to brighten your day! 😂✨ These witty gems sprinkle humor and happiness like confetti 🎉, making life’s little moments extra special. Whether you need a quick chuckle or a smile boost, funny delight quotes are your perfect pick-me-up! Ready to giggle and glow? Let’s dive into some delightful laughs! 😄🌟

New funny delight quotes 👇

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

0

2 months ago

activity, cancellation, delight, humor, others, plans, rain, upset, upsetting, weather

Someone from 🇰🇲 has recently bookmarked this quote.

17 shares on Facebook this month.
Delightful if true: booby trap.

0

2 months ago

booby, booby trap, delight, humor, joke, playful, surprise, trap, true

Someone from 🇪🇪 has recently bookmarked this quote.

112 shares on Snapchat this month.

All funny delight quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on WeChat this month:

I think my bank account has been taking Ozempic.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

65 shares on Snapchat this month:

I think my phone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at work.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

Y’all made fun of Plankton on Spongebob for dating a computer, and look at y’all now.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It’s truly insane when bosses assume their employees are working for any reason other than a paycheck.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

Asking women for sex just to end the conversation.

84 shares on Messenger this month:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

97 shares on Slack this month:

Maybe I prefer my ducks scattered about.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I booped your nose, but I was really hoping it was a mute button.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Telling my boss I can’t come back to work because I’ve discovered the joy of doing nothing.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you think Yoda says “7-6” instead?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The Midwest urge to have a drink on a patio as soon as it’s nice out.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I know you miss me. The tarot lady on TikTok just told me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,680

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I’m not really a “glass half full” kind of person. I’m more of a “Where’d I put my glass?” kind of person.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

I think that McDonalds is putting an unhealthy amount of lettuce in the Big Macs these days.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

You could waterboard pretty much any embarrassing information out of me. I’m very waterboardable.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Broadcasted on X:

Saw a shooting star and made a wish for everyone to stop talking to me.

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Seen just now on Threads:

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Live now on Messenger:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

Just landed via Instagram:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

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