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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

The only guarantee in life is, if you run errands looking like shit, you will run into everyone you haven’t seen in months.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Anyone still shut off lights when leaving a room because their parents used to say, “Don’t waste electricity!”

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Enjoying the consequences of my actions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Going bananas on Facebook:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

Making waves on YouTube:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

Just shared via Slack:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Freshly posted on Slack:

You’re my least favourite notification.

Just shared via Slack:

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

Trending via X:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Freshly posted on X:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

Going viral on Instagram:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

Trending via Reddit:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Funny delight quotes

Funny delight quotes bring a burst of joy and laughter to brighten your day! 😂✨ These witty gems sprinkle humor and happiness like confetti 🎉, making life’s little moments extra special. Whether you need a quick chuckle or a smile boost, funny delight quotes are your perfect pick-me-up! Ready to giggle and glow? Let’s dive into some delightful laughs! 😄🌟

New funny delight quotes 👇

All funny delight quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Instagram this month:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

88 shares on X this month:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Rescuing a cute dog and teaching it how to drive me home from the pub.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here.

26 shares on Messenger this month:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

11 shares on Instagram this month:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

60 shares on WeChat this month:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is diarrhea of the mouth at its finest. Everyone is just going around vomiting whatever is in their brains.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My only addiction is coffee, which is just like crack but is legal and tastes good.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I just borrowed some money from a cash app, now I’m about to uninstall it.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,621

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I like to minimize the disappointment by being myself right from the start.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I don’t think anything good will ever happen again until people feel bad about being stupid again.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It’s like Facebook in real life.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Getting a girlfriend is actually very easy, you just have to spin a basketball on your finger.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Sometimes I don’t have anything intelligent to say and sometimes I don’t let that stop me.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Gang members are so lucky to have something to do with their hands in photos.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Just landed via Slack:

I’m not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.

Shared recently on Slack:

Remember when we were kids and did everything we could to grow up? We were so stupid!

Just landed via Pinterest:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

Breaking via YouTube:

You wish you had this many chins.

Making waves on Instagram:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I just got lied to by 3K+ people. That recipe was awful.

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