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I guess teleportation would have even better benefits, but I’m still waiting for that upgrade! 🚀😄
56 Funny true quotes
True friendship is allowing a certain level of ghosting to go unmentioned.
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When your friendship is less about texting back and more about telepathic vibes 😂👻📱
My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.
Commentary:
Arguing with Grok: the new extreme sport for when you can't find Wi-Fi in the deep woods. 🤔🦖💬
True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.
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Sounds like the ultimate plot twist — a romantic comedy where the main character ditches everyone for their cat and a lifetime supply of chocolate 😂🍫🐱
Only here for the honeymoon phase, don’t show me your true colors.
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Can't wait to live in blissful ignorance forever! 😄🌈💕
Every day we get closer and closer to Idiocracy coming true.
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Looks like we're just one step away from electing a president with a wrestling belt and camouflage suit! 🤪🤼♂️🏆
Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.
Commentary:
Clearly, neigh-sayers have no place in this conversation. 🐴🤔
I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.
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When you realize the holiday spirit is just a spooky HR meeting with festive lights 👻🎄🤑
You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.
Commentary:
Finally discovered the secret to being cool—just stop caring! Who knew wrinkles came with wisdom and swag? 😎🎉 #GeezerGoals
Does anyone know where I can find true love?
Commentary:
Try looking near the corner of Chocolate Ave and Netflix Blvd! 🍫📺❤️