Funny quotes delivery

20 Funny delivery quotes

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

1 month ago

Uber Eats “you forgot to finish your order” notification is funny because I didn’t forget, I just came to my senses.

2 months ago

Waiting for the websites to start offering pizza instead of just cookies.

3 months ago

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

3 months ago

I ordered a new umbrella on Amazon and had it delivered straight to the lost and found office to maximize efficiency.

3 months ago

A driver that delivers Indian food is called a curryer.

3 months ago

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

3 months ago

There used to be many different names for the childhood game of knocking on doors and running away. But these days, it’s simply referred to as ‘being an Amazon driver’.

3 months ago

I don’t expect everything handed to me, just set it down outside my door.

3 months ago

I would never be comfortable delivering a baby. I can’t even remove an avocado pit without dropping it.

3 months ago

I grew up in a really small town. The closest thing we had to food delivery was someone egging your house.

3 months ago

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

3 months ago

Totally unrealistic movie title: “The Postman Always Rings Twice”. We all know that these guys only ring once and then leave.

3 months ago

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

3 months ago

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

3 months ago

Tinder is a food delivery app if you’re good at it.

3 months ago

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

3 months ago

The pizza delivery guys say “see you tomorrow” to everyone, right?

3 months ago

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

3 months ago

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

3 months ago