Gonorrhea would've been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

Commentary:
"Whoever missed the opportunity to name diarrhea medicine 'Gonorrhea' must've been too busy laughing! 💩😂 Sometimes a missed chance is a real, uh, relief! 😉"

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Commentary:
Ah, the joys of appreciating the art of doing nothing as we age, like a fine wine maturing in a barrel! 🍷 Embracing the relaxation game like a seasoned pro. 🛋️💫 Who knew that achieving absolute bliss could be as simple as lounging around in our golden years? 🌟 #DoingNothingGoals

Ears are great for tucking your hair behind in the wind. Big shout out to ears.

Ears are great for tucking your hair behind in the wind. Big shout out to ears.

Commentary:
👂🌬️ "Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a round of applause to our unsung heroes — ears! Not just for hearing all the juicy gossip, but also for providing the perfect spot to tuck away those rebellious locks in windy situations. Who knew our ears were the original hair accessories? Fashion and function at its finest! 😄👏"

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

Commentary:
"Life: the ultimate teacher that never gives you a break 📚✏️ Maybe if we all collectively failed the lesson, it might just stop teaching them! 🤔🛑 #LifeLessons"

It's strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

It’s strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

Commentary:
Well, isn't time just playing the long game of hide and seek with us? It's out here claiming to be a great healer, but really it's the ultimate undefeated champion in the game of life 🏆⏳💀 #PlotTwist #TimeIsNotAlwaysOnOurSide

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet's weird little teeth.

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

Commentary:
"Admiring your pet's quirky teeth is like finding hidden treasures in the world of adorable imperfections! 😬🐾 Embrace the dental charm of your furry friend and cherish those wonderfully weird pearly whites!"

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Commentary:
"Lesson learned: sometimes it's better to stick to classic moves instead of trying to sweeten the pot too much! 🍯😂 #HoneyGoneWrong"

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Commentary:
"Well, there goes my motivation for the week! 🤷‍♂️ Can't argue with that logic – might as well make the most of the weekend! 🎉 #YOLO #CarpeDiem"

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

Commentary:
"Who needs generational wealth when you've got a killer spaghetti sauce recipe? 🍝💰 Forget about trust funds, just pass me the parmesan! 😄 #SpaghettiHeirloom"

Tattoos are a great convo starter. So as an introvert, I kinda regret getting them.

Tattoos are a great convo starter. So as an introvert, I kinda regret getting them.

Commentary:
"Who knew your arm art could be a louder introvert than you? 🤭 Maybe next time opt for a temporary tattoo to keep the chats at a whisper level. 😜💬 #QuietTattooRegrets"