Funny quotes great

70 Funny great quotes

Just imagine how great life would be if pizza made you skinny.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

Funny Quotes Feb 28, 2025

Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

Funny Quotes Feb 20, 2025

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

Ears are great for tucking your hair behind in the wind. Big shout out to ears.

Funny Quotes Feb 3, 2025

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

It’s strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Tattoos are a great convo starter. So as an introvert, I kinda regret getting them.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Sleeping in in winter is really great, you still have about an hour of daylight left before it gets dark again.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Hangman is so great. No better way for a child to learn how to spell than by having to save a man from hanging to death.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The web is a great place to befriend people who you’d never let in your house.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Headless mannequins are great because they let you see how you’ll look wearing a new shirt after you’ve been decapitated.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025