121 funny great quotes - Page 3 - Wordgag

Guy on the day of the 1918 armistice, walking around the trench, clapping, saying things like “Great work, everyone,” and “We did it, team.”

Apr 1, 2026

Hiking in your 40s is a great way to meet new people. Today I met two paramedics, three nurses, a cardiologist, and nearly met Jesus.

Apr 1, 2026

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

Apr 1, 2026

“This is a great weekend to clean out the garage,” according to my wife and other people who won’t be cleaning the garage.

Apr 1, 2026

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Apr 1, 2026

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

Apr 1, 2026

Behind every great tweet is a person rolling their eyes.

Apr 1, 2026

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Mar 31, 2026

Ghosting is actually a sign of great respect in my culture.

Mar 31, 2026

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Mar 31, 2026

Unfortunately, a great many problems in life can be solved by just being hotter.

Mar 31, 2026

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

Mar 31, 2026

When someone has “Do Not Disturb” on, it’s like, oh, okay, I didn’t realize the great philosopher was in their hour of seclusion. Pardon me for even daring to enter their precious mind palace.

Mar 31, 2026

Girls be like, “Baby, I have a great idea,” and it’s a trip you have to pay for.

Mar 31, 2026

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Mar 31, 2026

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

Mar 31, 2026

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

Mar 31, 2026

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected.

Mar 31, 2026

With great power comes a huge electric bill.

Mar 31, 2026

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Mar 31, 2026

Whoever has my voodoo doll, if you could take some stuffing out of the midsection and give it a little forehead kiss, that would be great.

Mar 31, 2026

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

Mar 31, 2026

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Mar 30, 2026

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Mar 30, 2026

Do you mind if I smash this object of great sentimental value?

Mar 30, 2026

I don’t want to sound controversial, but having Monday off is great. We should do this every week.

Mar 30, 2026

Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Mar 30, 2026

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Mar 30, 2026

“Real Housewives” is a great oxymoron because nothing about them is real.

Mar 30, 2026

Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

Mar 30, 2026

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Mar 30, 2026

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Mar 29, 2026

Twitter is great because you can get good life advice from other emotionally unstable adults.

Mar 29, 2026

I used to have a great future in my past.

Mar 29, 2026

With great power comes a great electricity bill.

Mar 29, 2026

My body looks like I have a great personality.

Mar 29, 2026

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

Mar 29, 2026

Just imagine how great life would be if pizza made you skinny.

Mar 28, 2026

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Mar 28, 2026

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

Mar 28, 2026