Funny quotes ยป holiday ยป Page 9

128 Funny holiday quotes

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  • The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs expensive gifts when you have family drama to entertain you? 🎁💥 Let the battle of wills begin, and say goodbye to that holiday shopping list! 😂👊”

  • Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the joy of being single during the holidays. 🙃 While everyone else is busy decking the halls and roasting chestnuts over an open fire, us single folks are pros at putting on a brave face and pretending that we’re totally fine spending another night alone with our Netflix queue. 🎄🎁 Just think of it as an extended opportunity to practice your solo dance moves and enjoy the entire box of chocolates without any judgment! 💃🍫 #SingleBells #

  • Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so youโ€™re finally away from the relatives you donโ€™t like, and back with the co-workers you donโ€™t like.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the bittersweet transition from avoiding nosy Aunt Mildred to dodging chatty Steve from accounting 🙈 At least you have the office coffee machine to commiserate with ☕️ Here’s to another week of pretending to laugh at Dave’s unfunny jokes! 😆 #BackToReality”

  • Found a picture of me sitting on Santaโ€™s lap. Hard to believe itโ€™s been a whole year.

    Commentary:
    🎅📸 “Looks like Santa’s lap isn’t just for kids anymore! 🤭 Time flies when you’re having fun, or maybe when you’re on the naughty list… 😜🎄 #SantaSelfies #WhereDidTheTimeGo”

  • Itโ€™s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.
  • If you like Christmas so much, why donโ€™t you merry it?

    Commentary:
    🎄🎅 “If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it? Because who needs mistletoe when you can just marry Santa?” 😉💍 Embrace the holiday spirit all year round with your very own jolly ol’ fella! 🎁✨ #ChristmasEveryday

  • We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

    Commentary:
    Looks like the spirit of Christmas tilted more than just your tree! 🎄😂 Your wife may have uncovered your secret past as a world-renowned architect. Who knew decorating could reveal hidden talents? 😉🎅

  • My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone found the perfect gift-wrapping solution for their husband’s misdeeds! 🎁🌲 Who needs reindeer games when you’ve got remote control revenge tactics? 😆 #HolidayPranks #RelationshipGoals

    Fun Fact or Trivia:
    Did you know that the tradition of hanging stockings by the fireplace comes from a legend about Saint Nicholas? 🧦🔥 Legend has it that he gave gold coins to three sisters by dropping them down the chimney, and they landed in stockings that were hung to dry.

  • Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone is embracing the “Neighborhood Design Guru” title with gusto! 🎨🏡 Who needs a TV when you can simply gaze out the window at your masterpiece across the street? Just don’t forget the popcorn for the daily show! 🍿

  • Some of us better hope Santa doesnโ€™t check social media, because if he does, all weโ€™re getting for Christmas is therapy.

    Commentary:
    Looks like Santa’s sleigh isn’t the only thing that slides into your DMs! 🎅📱 If he ever takes a scroll through your social media, you might be unwrapping a whole lot of therapy sessions this Christmas! 😂🎁#NaughtyListBound

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