168 Funny kids quotes

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  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

  Commentary:
  "When the mango's juicier than your gossip… 🤫🥭😂"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

  Commentary:
  "Breaking news: Toddler parents officially know more about Peppa Pig than current events! Tune in next for the weather report from Paw Patrol! 🐷📰🤣"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

  Commentary:
  "Right?! If only adulting came with scream breaks. 🙃🎉😱"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

  Commentary:
  "Modern parenting: test-driving kids like they're on a 30-day return policy 😂👶🔄"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

  Commentary:
  "Name change? 😂 I better start posting more cat videos! 🐱📸 #DesperateTimes #FollowerFrenzy"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'Invisible Parent Act'—an enduring performance worthy of a standing ovation… from no one. 🎭🙈 #ParentingComedy"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Watching Jaws with my kid because I’m sick of going to the beach.

  Commentary:
  Looks like you're trading sandy toes for suspenseful roars! 🦈🏖️ Nothing like a movie night to avoid the sea's surprise guests. Just make sure your kid doesn't start eyeing the water suspiciously! 😅🎬

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  2 months ago

  Share →: It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the mysterious phenomenon of the ever-hungry, elusive dinner-time child 🤔🍽️! It's like they possess a magical stomach that only grumbles at the most inconvenient times. Maybe we should start serving appetizers during the main course to keep them satisfied! 🤣 #KidsAndTheirHungryWays

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like the zookeepers might want to keep an eye out for some cheeky monkeys swinging around the family tree! 🐒🌳 Let's hope they didn't pick up any wild habits during the visit! #ParentingAdventures

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Putting sunscreen on kids feels like cardio.

  Commentary:
  "Applying sunscreen on kids is the ultimate test of patience and agility, it's as intense as a cardio workout! 💪😅 Don't forget the resistance training when they squirm away like mini ninjas! 🤸‍♂️☀️ #SunscreenStruggles"

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