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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Stop roasting yourself, you’re not a marshmallow.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Peter Parker having to juggle a day job with being a superhero feels kinda stupid nowadays. Just launch a Patreon, my man. Throw a PayPal link in that Spider-bio.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1862 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,024

Funny Quotes Topics

14,817

Funny Quotes Images

12,024

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

You can just make up words and if you say them in a Scottish accent, people will think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

You wish you had this many chins.

Shared recently on Threads:

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

Trending via Pinterest:

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

Going viral on Facebook:

When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”

Trending via X:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The walk of shame, except it’s me at a bowling alley walking back to sit down after I knock down zero pins with bumpers.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Broadcasted on Discord:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1862 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,024

Funny Quotes Topics

14,817

Funny Quotes Images

12,024

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Do you ever want sleep but sleep doesn’t want you?

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

If I don’t duck my head when I drive into the parking garage, what’s gonna keep my car from hitting the ceiling?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

There should be an opposite of Valentine’s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Trending via YouTube:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

Shared recently on X:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Just shared via Reddit:

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

Reported on Slack:

Why do fish stink so much even though they bathe their whole lives?

Trending via Snapchat:

My attempts to purge my possessions always seem to result in me rediscovering that I have lots of nice things, after which I lie happily on my hoard like a dragon.

Reported on Pinterest:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Trending via X:

The sole purpose of your child’s middle name… is so they know when they’re really in trouble.

Going viral on Slack:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Spotted on WeChat:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

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