172 Funny person quotes

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  3 months ago

  Share →: A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a makeover when you have Photoshop to save the day? 💁‍♂️💻 Say goodbye to bad hair days and hello to flawless selfies! 😜 #FilterGoals"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I could be a morning person, if morning was sometime around noon.

  Commentary:
  "Whoever said 'early bird catches the worm' clearly didn't account for the beauty of a cozy lie-in until lunchtime 🌞😴 Better to be a late-riser and catch the brunch, am I right? 🍳☕️"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Nobody’s more stubborn than an Android person that won’t switch to iPhone.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the battle of the tech giants continues! 📱💪 Who knew resisting the allure of an iPhone could make an Android user feel like they're holding their ground on a battlefield? 😂 Don't underestimate their loyalty – they're firm in their tech beliefs! #TeamAndroid 🤖 #TeamiPhone 🍏

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  3 months ago

  Share →: We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

  Commentary:
  🎮🎂 "Forget about age, we should all be leveling up like video game characters! Imagine proudly announcing you're a level 80 wizard instead of just saying you're getting older. I'm getting ready to defeat the final boss of adulthood at level 100!" 🧙‍♂️✨

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  3 months ago

  Share →: The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone just invented the original form of "drop the mic" moment in history! 💦🛁😄 #OopsieDaisies

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  3 months ago

  Share →: A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, so that's why I feel lighter on Mars! 🚀 No wonder my diet plans never seemed to work here on Earth. 🌍 It's not me, it's just planetary confusion! Can't blame a person for being a misplaced alien. 👽😂 #MarsIsMyRealHome"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Conflicts may arise but always remember to be the bitter person.

  Commentary:
  "Conflicts may arise, but why be the bitter person when you can be the better person? 🌟 Choose kindness over bitterness, it's easier on the taste buds! 😉🍋"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the art of forgiveness – where you take a deep breath, count to ten, and remind yourself that not everyone can be blessed with the same level of intelligence. It's like a special kind of compassion for the intellectually challenged, bless their hearts."

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Just because you haven’t found the right person, doesn’t mean you will.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal search for the elusive 'right person' – a quest as mysterious and unpredictable as finding matching socks in the laundry. Keep looking, dear friend, for in the vast sea of potentials, there may just be a diamond in the rough…or at least someone who can tolerate your questionable taste in movies."

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

  Commentary:
  "Mr. Beast – the human embodiment of Dubai! 💸✨ Just when you thought the extravagance couldn't get any bigger, here comes Mr. Beast shining brighter than the city lights! 💰🌆 #LivingLarge"

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