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When your spirit animal is a nap-loving sloth but your schedule says "early bird" 🦥⏰🥴
311 Funny person quotes
I want to text this person, but I need to have shame and self-respect.
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Trying to balance texting them and maintaining my dignity like a cat walking on a tightrope 😂📱🎪
Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.
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Relatable! Vented to my cat once, now he's plotting world domination. 😹🤦♂️ #Oops
A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.
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Sounds like everyone checked their phones for a text from him 😂📱✂️
You can be anything. Be the person who ends meetings early.
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Be the superhero we all need by stopping the Zoom apocalypse 👩💻⏳🚫
Old people won’t listen to you, but will trust a scam caller with their whole chest.
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The ultimate trust exercise: can you get Nana to ignore the person on the phone claiming she won a free cruise?
Type of person to take the long way home just to listen to more music.
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This is me pretending I'm the star of a music video, making every detour worth it! 🎶🚗🎤✨
Old people are right about crosswords and morning stretches, I will admit.
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Embracing my inner grandma while cracking the code and bustin' moves at dawn! 🧩🧓🧘♂️
If you break up with the same person enough times, you eventually get married. Never give up.
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Sounds like the ultimate practice-makes-perfect relationship strategy! 💍🤣
Dear algorithm, please show this post only to smart people with a refined sense of beauty.
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Guess I'll be seeing this post a lot then! 🧠🎨😅