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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

At my age, getting up early just means that I had to go pee, and I couldn’t hold it anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I tried yoga once. I pulled a hamstring and my dignity.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Here’s to a new year of making the same old mistakes, but with far more enthusiasm.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

If the number 666 is considered evil, then technically, 25.8069758 is the root of all evil.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,526

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

We need a slur for people that use AI.

Just landed via Facebook:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Making waves on YouTube:

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Just landed via Slack:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

“Clean” my shower? Then what? Give my car a ride into town?

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

Making waves on TikTok:

Instead of writing letters, let’s wait a week before texting each other back so it still feels like it.

Funny pool table quotes

Funny pool table quotes break the ice 🎱 and bring laughter to every game night! Whether you’re sinking balls or scratching your head 🤔, these witty lines add extra fun 💥 to the table. Perfect for players, fans, and anyone who loves a good chuckle while aiming for that perfect shot. Get ready to cue up some smiles and rack up the laughs! 😄✨

New funny pool table quotes 👇

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

0

2 months ago

billiards, favorite, favorite hole, favourite, game, hole, humor, i, me, playful, playful remark, pool, pool table, remark, sport, table
Men invented pool tables so they could watch each other bend over.

0

6 months ago

bend, bending, bending over, humor, invention, men, over, pool, pool table, table, tables, watch

All funny pool table quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Messenger this month:

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

74 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

26 shares on Threads this month:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

43 shares on X this month:

Friends with benefits, but it’s just that they make delicious baked goods.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

54 shares on Messenger this month:

When women get to a certain weight, you’ll notice they change their social media profile pictures to flowers, cats, or dogs.

60 shares on Slack this month:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My New Year’s resolution will be to stop chasing waterfalls, and stick to the rivers and the lakes that I’m used to.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like my greatest accomplishment today has been not saying what I’m thinking out loud.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Age is just a number that you keep off of Facebook after 35.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,728

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

My dad wasn’t absent or present; he was a secret third thing.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.”

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

With great power comes a huge electric bill.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Just shared via Slack:

Pepsi & Coca-Cola can’t even be in the same restaurant… and we want world peace.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’m seriously considering adoption. Who wants me?

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m a fully functional adult with the energy levels of a hibernating bear.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I forgot my password, failed the captcha and have been accused of being a robot. I don’t even know how to fight these allegations.

Going viral on X:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

Spotted on Slack:

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

Making waves on Telegram:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Even wild things have slow mornings.

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