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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New funny quotes: 13625 this month

15,818 funny quotes and pics

17,814 funny quotes topics

Updated: May 28, 2026

 

 

 

 

19 Funny remark quotes

Funny remark quotes are the perfect sprinkle of humor 🍰 to brighten your day and spark laughter 😂 in any conversation. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or drop a witty one-liner 💬, these clever gems will have you grinning from ear to ear 😄. Get ready to unleash your inner comedian and spread some good vibes! 🎉✨

Can I come over and circle you like a vulture?

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Ugh, but profoundly.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

When life gives you lemons maybe think to yourself, “that’s really quite remarkable given how far I live from a climate capable of growing citrus.”

Posted onMay 25, 2026

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Posted onMay 23, 2026

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

Posted onMay 22, 2026

When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying ‘Haven’t decided yet’ is typically a good response.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

You wish you had this many chins.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

I liked the version of you from the other dimension better.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

If you have nothing nice to say, I promise you that I’ll have something even worse to say back.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

I do not have a “body count.” I have a curious spirit.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

I must retire to my chambers about this.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

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