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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I use subtitles so if I learn anything interesting I can say “I was reading about” instead of “I saw on an episode of Love Island”

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Running from your problems is cardio.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

31 minutes ago

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Just landed via X:

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

Breaking via Slack:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

Just shared via Twitch:

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

Shared recently on TikTok:

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

Freshly posted on X:

I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!

Just landed via Pinterest:

Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Stores should accept “I bought this while depressed” as a valid reason for a return.

Home » Funny Quickie Quotes

Funny quickie quotes

New funny quickie quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Commentary:
"Talk about efficiency in the bedroom! 😂 When you're in a hurry, why settle for a 'quickie' when you can have a 'secs'? Just remember, time is of the essence! ⏱️😜"

For even more funny quickie quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny quickie quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

31 minutes ago

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

I have nothing nice to wear for the government shutdown.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Just landed via WeChat:

The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My favorite color is money.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If the USA is so great, why did someone make the USB?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Breaking via Reddit:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Just shared via Threads:

I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, man.

Spotted on Reddit:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

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