Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I identify as Michael Jackson, so my pronouns are “he/hee.”

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

My favorite unit of measurement is smithereens.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

The problem is that younger me didn’t account for the fact that there’d be an older me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Going viral on Threads:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Trending via X:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Just landed via TikTok:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a vacation… while still on vacation.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Shared recently on Facebook:

If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

Trending via Facebook:

Ok, I cheated in school, but I did it the hard way and without AI.

Breaking via Twitch:

Accidentally used my real personality at work today… heading to HR now.

Making waves on Instagram:

It’s crazy how drinking poison makes you feel like shit the next day.

Funny Snapchat quotes

Funny Snapchat quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 😂 and personality 🎉 to your snaps! Whether you’re aiming to make your friends LOL 🤣 or just brighten their day 🌟, these witty lines will keep your stories fresh and fun. Ready to level up your snap game? Let’s dive into some hilarious vibes that’ll have everyone tapping replay! 📱✨

New funny Snapchat quotes 👇

All funny Snapchat quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

28 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

46 shares on WeChat this month:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

“Stop talking about old drama!” God forbid a girl and her bestie enjoy their history lessons.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

93 shares on Snapchat this month:

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

92 shares on TikTok this month:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

15 shares on Threads this month:

Every marriage has a personality hire, and then someone who knows how insurance works.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Trust my gut? The thing that makes weird gurgling noises immediately when a work meeting goes quiet.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I love my bed so much, what a place.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,683

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

I could put my keys in the same spot every day, but why deprive myself of a treasure hunt that makes me late.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Unfortunately for the both of us, I really like you.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

Randomly hearing your favorite song is more satisfying than putting it on yourself.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Donuts hug you from the inside.

Spotted on Threads:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Making waves on Snapchat:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

Trending via Pinterest:

Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

Just landed via Discord:

Sometimes I struggle to adjust to civilian life after coming home from the movies.

Trending via Telegram:

Some people avoid bacon for the sake of religion. I avoid religion for the sake of bacon.

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