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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Stop trying to be liked by everybody. You don’t even like everybody.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

There’s an unwritten rule: if you need something and it’s available at your mom’s house, it’s yours.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

For your own sanity, always take mixed signals as a no.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I can’t tell if I’m in preschool or school… Oh wait, I’m at work.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

My problem is, I wanna be the only one at the gym when I go.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Trying to make sense of other people’s actions will drive you to insanity.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,480

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Making waves on Twitch:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Making waves on Threads:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Need to become a tour guide. I’ve just realized it’s the only job I can think of that combines my loves of walking around and knowing more than everyone around me.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Taking action is my least favorite thing to take.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

Making waves on WeChat:

Someone from Facebook Marketplace is coming over to either buy the chairs I have for sale, or to murder me.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I’m not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing.

Funny tanning quotes

Funny tanning quotes ☀️😎 are the perfect way to brighten your day while you soak up those rays! Whether you’re a sun worshipper or a beach bum, these witty sayings add a splash of humor to your glow-up routine 🌴🌞. Ready to laugh through your next tan session? Get comfy, grab your sunnies, and let the good vibes shine! 🌺🕶️

New funny tanning quotes 👇

All funny tanning quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on YouTube this month:

“Try it all before you die” is always drugs and sex, never quantum physics.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

Leaving out milk and cookies for Santa is literally making an offering to a deity.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

My wife is napping quietly and the villain of this story is about to be this sneeze.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

Saving on divorce lawyers by staying single.

75 shares on Threads this month:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

82 shares on WeChat this month:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

Caesar, looking shocked: “Is it bring your knife to work day or something?”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Your birthday as an adult mainly consists of texting back ‘Thanks!’ to people you haven’t talked to in 5 years.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Things will be fine, eventually—in thousands of years—for rocks.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s no bigger test of patience than typing your email address in on a TV with the remote.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,389

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

It can be so healing to stay up until 3am. Unfortunately, it will also completely ruin your life.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

My budget for this month is a smile, and I don’t know how long that will last.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Just worked out for 2 hours straight and 1 hour gay.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

My door camera alerts are all just me stepping outside to see how warm it is.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Chores give kids a sense of responsibility while teaching relevant life skills such as procrastination.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’m going to need to speak with the flowers about this.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I forgot to get milk, so Santa has a cup of Pepsi Max.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Making waves on Facebook:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Just landed via Telegram:

People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Aura farming in front of old people by not listening to music nor checking my phone.

Spotted on Instagram:

How about hold me as tight as you’re holding onto that grudge?

Going bananas on Discord:

The more I insisted marshmallows were vegetables, the angrier my doctor got.

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