Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡­ has copied:

Keeping a picture of my bed in a locket around my neck and staring at it longingly on my lunch break.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ό has copied:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ώ has copied:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ό has copied:

Hobbies include being misunderstood.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ά has viewed:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ώ has shared:

I always bring luggage when visiting my mom because I know she’ll send me on a guilt trip.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

It’s okay to get rid of the boxes for the electronic things you’ve had for the past couple of years.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

Less talkie. More kissie.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,377

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on X:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Making waves on YouTube:

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

You’re mistaking me with someone who’s stupid.

Live now on Reddit:

Be yourself cause no one wants to be like you!

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I’m so grateful when people tell me to drive safe, cause then I remember not to drive off that cliff.

Just shared via Telegram:

People be like β€œI love your energy” – then drain it.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Lord, take away my suffering and give it to anyone who’s ever said, ‘Hey, Grok.’

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’ll never tell anyone your secret because that would mean talking to people.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I like how β€œenergy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.

Humorous text comparing dating app choices to quirky, unexpected options.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Swipe left for the grandpa, swipe right for the jailbird πŸ§“πŸ”’ Looks like the dating pool is more like a pond with those options! 🌊 Who said romance was dead? πŸ’”πŸ˜‚"

, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going πŸ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on WeChat this month:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

78 shares on Threads this month:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

88 shares on Reddit this month:

Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

52 shares on Messenger this month:

Does everyone’s inner monologue have a laugh track?

48 shares on Reddit this month:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

It was the worst of times, it was the worst of times.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

33 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t have bad handwriting, I’m just using my own font.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

Stay up till 4 a.m. one night, and your sleep schedule is ruined for the next 4 years.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’ve never been cut in half by a magician, but I have worn jeans on Thanksgiving. Same thing.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

16 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’ve calculated my December budget and realized I can only afford to pray.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The cinema vibe is my favorite, you literally forget about the world for like 2-3 hours.

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Right now somebody’s therapist is hearing about YOU.

6 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,592

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡· has copied:

Why sleep when you can stay up all night overthinking?

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¦ has copied:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡― has bookmarked:

Laying in a hammock is essentially saying, β€œI hope there are no emergencies.”

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¨ has bookmarked:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ά has copied:

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡© has viewed:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡· has viewed:

Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on X:

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Making waves on TikTok:

I should go to jail so I can focus on the gym.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Marriage is between two people: one person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked.

Going bananas on Slack:

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit. So proud of myself. It was a scarf, but still, let’s be positive here.

Just landed via Twitch:

I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

Just landed via WeChat:

Outside letting mosquitoes get some of this.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

β€œYour call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

Just landed via Telegram:

Have you ever apologized to your car after you hit a pothole?

Going bananas on Telegram:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Β© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❀️ in Sydney β˜€οΈπŸŒ΄