Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Looks like someone is navigating through the delicate dance of marriage etiquette! 😄 Remember, when it comes to wedding humor, treading lightly is always a veil-y good idea! 👰🚫💍 #HappyWifeHappyLife

bride, guest, humor, marriage, relationship, threat, veiled, veiled threat, wedding, wedding guest, wife

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

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2 months ago

am, exaggeration, humor, i, joke, late, late night, million, night, procrastination, staying, staying up, time, tonight
l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

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2 months ago

Christmas, Christmas tree, dead, holiday, humor, identify, identity, inside, irony, lit, outside, tree
Watching true crime documentaries so I can learn from their mistakes.

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2 months ago

crime, crime genre, documentary, entertainment, genre, humor, i, learn, learning, mistakes, sarcastic, true, true crime, watching, witty
Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

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2 months ago

12, 3, 4, before, charge, comedy, directing, episodes, films, humor, movie, movie order, order, sci-fi, star, Star Wars, wars, Yoda
They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

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2 months ago

finance, goodbye, humor, joke, just, money, sarcasm, say, spending, wit
Fake laughing at work is exhausting as hell, just leave me alone, bro.

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2 months ago

alone, bro, exhausting, exhaustion, fake, fake laugh, hell, humor, interaction, just, laugh, laughing, leave, me, social, social interaction, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Snapchat this month:

I go to tattoo parlors and trick them into shaving my leg for me, and then leave.

69 shares on WeChat this month:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Presumably, if you had a time machine, you could just kill young adult Hitler. The baby part seems gratuitous.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

Obsessed with how Siri just doesn’t work at all, ever.

96 shares on Twitch this month:

In case you wanna quit vaping, I’d suggest using a harmonica.

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age.

86 shares on Reddit this month:

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

I’m an adult. I can do whatever I want. And yet, here I am just doing laundry, eating salads, taking antidepressants, flossing my teeth, and going on little walks. Like an IDIOT.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Shaved my entire body for this post, just in case.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Threatening my wife with a tariff every time she makes fun of me.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I tiptoe near my medicine cabinet because I don’t want to wake my sleeping pills.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Sure, I’m uncomfortable, but only in situations.

Just landed via Threads:

Nobody seems more shocked, disappointed and dismayed than the person behind the post office counter when I arrive and say I’ve got something to post.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I saw someone wearing a shirt today that said “Eat Pasta Run Fasta,” and I can’t get it out of my head.

Going viral on TikTok:

The worst part about being an adult is that no matter how sad you get, the show must go on.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Instagram is run by celebrities. Twitter is run by the streets.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I wonder what the part of my brain that used to store people’s phone numbers is doing now.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

It’s never too early to be sad about having to work the next day.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Nothing really prepares you for when your favorite sweatpants begin to fall apart.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

In my culture, family is completely unimportant. And we hate food.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

Watching true crime documentaries so I can learn from their mistakes.

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

Fake laughing at work is exhausting as hell, just leave me alone, bro.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨