Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’m clumsy but there are upsides. For example, if I finish my chips and I’m sad there’s no more chips, I look in my lap and I always find chips.
  • Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?
  • Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.
  • I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.
  • They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.
  • The easiest way to shop with kids is not to.