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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Dear Santa, Money!

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

721 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,883

Funny Quotes Topics

13,864

Funny Quotes Images

10,883

Updated

47 minutes ago

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

I’m feeling sexy today. You’ve been warned.

Breaking via Instagram:

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Waiting for the websites to start offering pizza instead of just cookies.

Going viral on Twitch:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ll see you in court (at the marriage registry) (I love you)

Broadcasted on YouTube:

It’s so crazy how people are never down to just go get a burger. It didn’t used to be like this.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.
I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, technically you're only supposed to obey the traffic laws when there's a cop nearby, right? Or at least that's what some daredevils like to believe. Just make sure your guardian angel has a valid driver's license!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology think time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

721 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,883

Funny Quotes Topics

13,864

Funny Quotes Images

10,883

Updated

47 minutes ago

Users Online

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Country music is for men who need a little help crying.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

If an ice cream truck has its music on, are you supposed to pull over and let it pass like an ambulance?

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Single in the womb, single till the tomb!

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Sometimes I wish I understood what some of you said and sometimes I am happy that I don’t.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Just shared via X:

Breaking News: Local woman stuns in new unnecessary online purchase.

Seen just now on Instagram:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Just landed via Telegram:

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

Reported on WeChat:

Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Trending via Snapchat:

“Get a life!” Have you seen some of the lives out there?

Reported on Discord:

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

Breaking via Twitch:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Breaking via Discord:

Summer is the time when it’s too hot to do what it was too cold to do in winter.

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