I didn’t really feel old until my doctor hit me with the “at your age…”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

A good man is hard to find, but a babysitter for Friday night is harder.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Every time I talk, it sounds like it’s my first time trying to speak.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.