Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Googling symptoms until you cry.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

The Frankfurt School?? What are you majoring in, hot dog?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Call me Frankenstein the way I’m piecing it together.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I live in constant fear that some douchebag is going to show up to a bonfire with a guitar.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,515

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

Just landed via Instagram:

Only thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m stupid.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Just landed via Threads:

Trying to be cute today but my face isn’t cooperating.

Spotted on Threads:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little riddles you get to solve later.

Going viral on Facebook:

I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Whatever the plot is in Barbie’s movie, my dolls have been through worse.

Trending via Reddit:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Live now on Discord:

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

1 week ago

Playful quote about robot taxis supporting robots' mobility with a witty, tech-savvy vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question of robot transportation! 🤖🚕 Looks like even robots need a lift sometimes – and who can blame them? It's rough out there in the concrete jungle! 🌆 Keep those robot taxis running, folks – it's all part of helping our mechanical friends navigate this crazy world! 🌍🚖"

around, else, humor, i, joke, mobility, robot, robots, support, taxi, technology, transportation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on X this month:

Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

39 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve been commissioned to kiss you on the lips. I need to get this done by tonight.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“I saw your ex!” A very unnecessary piece of information.

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

15 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

75 shares on Messenger this month:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

A job interview is basically a conversation between two liars.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Meetings are just podcasts I didn’t choose.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,447

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

It feels like it costs $100 a day just to exist anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

I don’t want to adult today, I just want to dog. I’ll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Good morning to everyone except my baby, who already said good morning to me at 1 a.m., 3 a.m., and 5:46 a.m.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

January 1st always feels like a Sunday, regardless of what day it’s actually on.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Having a job is insane because they give you actual money in exchange for pressing the buttons.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Hey (with the intention of going to sleep).

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Going viral on Instagram:

You look like you take lavender bubble baths with rose petals, surrounded by candles, bro.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

Freshly posted on Slack:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Spotted on Discord:

Hotel elevators are hell for those of us who are small-talk failures. The guy asked me, “You just get in today too?” and I said, “Well, no,” then stood in silence.

Just landed via Threads:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

Spotted on Messenger:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

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