Trendy Funny Quotes

  • 99% of celebrating your birthday as an adult just consists of texting back “thanks so much”.
  • Grandmas be like: Imma stay for a few days and reset your children back to factory settings.
  • The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.
  • Me, waiting on an email: What the hell is taking so long, this is ridiculous. Me, sending an email: this can probably wait another three weeks or so.
  • The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.
  • Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.