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Commentary:
"Swimming may be good exercise, but have you ever seen a whale doing Zumba? 🐋💃 Clearly, they are on a whole other fitness level! Maybe we all need to add a bit more blubber to our workout routine. 😜💪"

contradiction, exercise, fitness, good, humor, swimming, whale

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

1 month ago

bathroom, gangster, humor, need, pee, reality, situation, urgency
“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

1 month ago

bounce, conversation, frustration, i, leg, screaming, start, stop
I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

1 month ago

bread, food, friendship, garlic, humor, i, never
I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

3 months ago

calling, everything, grok, guy, humor, i, know-it-all, knows, new, new guy, nickname, office, started, work
Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

1 month ago

20, again, age, birthday, humor, i, know, nostalgia, reflection, regret, time, wisdom, youth
Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

1 month ago

basket, best, chores, empty, having, humor, laundry, life, moment, satisfaction, seconds

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

I’ve used dark mode so much that I’m physically repulsed by white screens now.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had garlic bread?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

My favorite childhood memory is having energy.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WeChat:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Shared recently on Reddit:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

Going viral on Telegram:

If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

Going viral on Threads:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

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Activity Log ✨

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Anyone else get excited about going to bed because you know there’ll be coffee in the morning, or is that just me?

Mini skirts are so cute and fun, like, oops, my ass is out.

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

Source? It was revealed to me on a walk.

Therapy should be free and accessible because getting traumatized is free and accessible.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

You can fake a smile, but you can’t fake jazz hands.

Plot twist: a Mission Impossible movie where the mission is in fact impossible.

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

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If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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