In my house the roles are reversed cause my kids tell me to turn my music down.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

The problem is that you are in the dating pool when the other fish are in the ocean.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Black Friday used to have heart. I wanna see someone get clocked for a Wii.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.