Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ผ๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has shared:

Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡พ has copied:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ has bookmarked:

Warning: This movie contains โ€œAdult Themesโ€ such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฏ has copied:

80% of arguments start because someone hasnโ€™t eaten yet.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,301

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Shared recently on Twitch:

Befuddlingly, a palm tree won’t fit in your hand.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

Just landed via YouTube:

Itโ€™s freaking me out to think of how bad Iโ€™d look at the Met Gala.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

Spotted on Discord:

They should invent a good thing that happens.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

Just landed via Twitch:

I commented to a friend that I didnโ€™t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Just landed via X:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Playful quote about how hard it is to change online opinions.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
Trying to change someone's mind on the internet? ๐Ÿช Good luck, you might have better odds getting that camel through a needle! ๐Ÿชก๐Ÿ˜… #OnlineDebates #MissionImpossible

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

Funny Quotes Collections
โœจ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars โญ

52 shares on TikTok this month:

The sexual tension between me and the person Iโ€™m not supposed to have any sexual tension with.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Hey babe, wanna come over and fold me like a fitted sheet?

82 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

35 shares on Slack this month:

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

13 shares on Reddit this month:

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Imagine thinking you have all the answers.

98 shares on Slack this month:

You can fake an American accent all you want, but โ€œliterallyโ€ will expose you.

83 shares on TikTok this month:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Some of you arenโ€™t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

For once, I would just like to underthink a situation. How do you guys do that?

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

5 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sorry, I ghosted you. I just felt like you were gonna ghost me, so I did it first.

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The amount of sleeping Iโ€™ve done over the past few days has been phenomenal. I genuinely love doing absolutely nothing.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My teen being nice to me is getting really expensive.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

No email needs to tell me not to reply.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,648

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡น has copied:

Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

Tiime isnโ€™t on my side, itโ€™s on my face, wrinkling my forehead.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฏ has shared:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฏ has downloaded:

Follow me on Instagram if you want to see me post absolutely nothing for weeks.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ต has bookmarked:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡พ๐Ÿ‡ช has viewed:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has downloaded:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Can I come over and figure you out?

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via WeChat:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Making waves on Threads:

I canโ€™t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Stop asking me if Iโ€™m tired. Canโ€™t I just be ugly?

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Whenever ะ† wake up and see that someone has wrั–tten a bunch of funny posts before noon, ะ† assume they are a mornั–ng drั–nker.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

There is a giant spider on my dash so Iโ€™m going to have to buy a new car now.

Going viral on Threads:

Friday the 13th doesnโ€™t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Breaking via Snapchat:

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

Just landed via Telegram:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with โค๏ธ in Sydney โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒด