It is not without reason that all telescopes searching for intelligent life are pointed away from Earth.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I don’t know why everyone wants love like in the movies. A movie is only 2 hours.

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Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

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Wi-Fi: Your internet connection is unstable. Me: You should see my life.

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People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

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This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

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If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

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I think the worst part about the collapse of civilization will be all those people with no way to remove their braces.

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People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.