Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Parenting: the art of negotiating with tiny, relentless snack scavengers until you realize resistance is futile and you surrender to the snack demands 🍎🍪🤣

family, food, frustration, give, give in, humor, just, kids, over, parenting, repetition, snack, throw, yelling

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

0

2 months ago

care, dental, dental hygiene, every, humor, hygiene, hygiene neglect, neglect, night, nighttime, oral, oral care, teeth, unbrushed
You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

0

2 weeks ago

actual, always, bad, bad music, behavior, criticism, ever, fan, fan behavior, fans, focus, meaning, music, music criticism, music fan, music taste, notice, song, song meaning, songs, taste, worst
Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because it’s just such a joy to be alive.

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2 months ago

alive, entertainment, every, five, giving, happiness, humor, i, joy, just, movie, positivity, review, single, star, watch
70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

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2 months ago

am, bullshit, drowning, frustration, here, humor, i, irony, planet, sarcasm, water
Women aren’t complicated. Just give us attention and leave us alone.

0

2 months ago

alone, attention, communication, give, humor, just, leave, relationship, simplicity, women
My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

0

2 months ago

boyfriend, comments, emoji, every, extinguisher, fire, fire extinguisher, flame, girl, humor, i, jealousy, keep, mad, me, pictures, relationship

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Facebook this month:

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

58 shares on Instagram this month:

Why would anyone ever jump OUT of a cake?

61 shares on Slack this month:

My parents think they know me.

49 shares on Telegram this month:

What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

73 shares on Threads this month:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

64 shares on Slack this month:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

55 shares on Instagram this month:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

88 shares on Reddit this month:

The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

70 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t get treadmills, I mean if I walk I better reach somewhere.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Y’all smell that? A beautiful day that the Lord has made.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

The peace of not knowing.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

“What’s your 5-year plan?” I’ll probably go to the movies next week, I think.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Your secret is safe with me and my sister.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I tried yoga once. I pulled a hamstring and my dignity.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler getting his nose wiped.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Trending via Reddit:

It triggers the little girl in me when I feel like I’m not being listened to when I’m talking.

Going viral on Instagram:

Just asked this girl Hannah how she spells her name, and she just said, “Two of everything, darling.” Iconic!

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

Going viral on Instagram:

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Writing ‘thanks.’ instead of ‘thanks!’ so you know I’m mad.

Just landed via Slack:

Every time I use self-checkout, the person in front of me has never used self-checkout, touchscreens, or money before.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because it’s just such a joy to be alive.

70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

Women aren’t complicated. Just give us attention and leave us alone.

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨