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Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

If the Beatles were just 4 lads from Liverpool, imagine what 400 lads from Liverpool would sound like. But y’all aren’t ready for that conversation.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Bon Jovi must be at least 3/4 of the way there by now.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

You may find my attraction to Goofy weird, but I don’t give a hyuck.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I’m developing a new fragrance for introverts. It’s called: “Leave me the fuh cologne”.

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Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Just shared via Telegram:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

Freshly posted on Threads:

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Going viral on Instagram:

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

Spotted on Instagram:

When you accidentally laugh at your own thoughts, and now people are staring.

Just shared via YouTube:

Sausage might clog my arteries, but it lubricates my soul.

Shared recently on X:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

Shared recently on Discord:

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

Trending via Telegram:

To everyone I’ve wronged this year. Next year same time, same place.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Many of you need to put “lighten up” on your resolutions list.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

3 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful joke about love and sleep with witty, light-hearted words.

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Commentary:
"Roses are red, time to rest my head. The romance is dead, unless you count dreams instead. 💤🥀 #BedtimeMedley"

bed, going, humor, poetry, red, relaxation, roses, roses are red, sleep

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12 shares on Snapchat this month:

Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.

88 shares on Twitch this month:

I skip questions on exams like I’m gonna be a different person when I come back to them.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Me, after skipping the tutorial: how the hell do you play this game?

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

In a parallel universe, I go to bed early and wake up fresh and unstoppable.

34 shares on Slack this month:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

41 shares on Discord this month:

Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.

24 shares on Discord this month:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Hey girl, do you like my signals? I mixed them myself.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

My house was clean yesterday. Sorry, you missed it.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Netflix & by yourself.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Nothing you want to do has a timeline.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Please make sure you are only drinking as much water as you REALLY need. We need that for the data centers. If you’re thirsty, AI is thirsty too.

Just shared via Reddit:

Polish girls are just winter Latinas.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

Making waves on Facebook:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Live now on Threads:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Spotted on Telegram:

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Babe, wanna come over and watch me apply for jobs on Indeed until I start to cry.

Making waves on Messenger:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

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Activity Log ✨

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨