Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Introducing… 'Clang-Bang-Bash!' 🤯🛠️🎉 Your one-stop app for deciphering the mysterious symphony of chaos from the upper floors! Whether it's a dance party or an indoor roller derby, we've got you covered! Just remember, what happens upstairs, stays upstairs… unless you download this app. 😜📱"

apartment, hell, Shazam, upstairs, whatever

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

1 month ago

adult, functioning, humor, identity, interpretation, loose, welcome
For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

1 month ago

Alexa, anything, conversation, conversations, humor, joke, listen, listening, making, male, male version, privacy, technology, version, want
People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

2 months ago

diet, food, frustration, humor, lunch, mad, people
Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

1 month ago

apocalyptic, argument, arguments, breaks, comedy, coming, debate, end, end of world, expert, expert panel, fire, humor, ice, next, others, panel, satire, say, side, world
Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

1 month ago

answer, full, humor, idiot, idiots, life, question, questions, sarcasm
If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

1 month ago

adult, adult life, adulting, humor, ID, joke, life, life joke, policy, responsibility, return, return policy, sarcasm

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

69 but we both just farting.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

Shared recently on Threads:

Plot twist: a Mission Impossible movie where the mission is in fact impossible.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

What I learned from Covid is that it’s basically possible to do all your work from home while drunk.

Shared recently on WeChat:

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

Trending via Facebook:

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

I am re-watching “Narcos,” and I have to say that for someone who smokes so much weed, Pablo Escobar gets a lot done.

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

My hobbies include going home, wishing I was at home, and being at home.

Do you ever find yourself just thinkin’ about bread?

Trust my gut? The thing that can’t even handle milk.

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

I’ll be like “I’m fine” then shake my leg at 150 mph.

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Nothing flies faster than the ketchup out of the bottle when you only want a little.

Me to cat: quit looking at me like I’m an ingredient.

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

I’m one of those lucky people that can eat whatever they want and not put on any clothes.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏