Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

“I’m currently not accepting new items on my to-do list.”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s, you now respond to every younger person telling you their age with “Jesus Christ”.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Wake me up when I’m rich!

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Weddings should have a worst man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2447 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,609

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,609

13 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I wish I had the confidence of someone who would let themselves be tattooed in a place they can’t see.

Live now on YouTube:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Breaking via Snapchat:

In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Trending via Threads:

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

Reported on YouTube:

All kids are born with a sixth sense that lets them know the absolute worst time to ask for something.

Just shared via Threads:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore, I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Those who run away from me are afraid that they might confess their love to me.

Live now on X:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Jan 25, 2025

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Introducing… 'Clang-Bang-Bash!' 🤯🛠️🎉 Your one-stop app for deciphering the mysterious symphony of chaos from the upper floors! Whether it's a dance party or an indoor roller derby, we've got you covered! Just remember, what happens upstairs, stays upstairs… unless you download this app. 😜📱"

apartment, hell, Shazam, upstairs, whatever

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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1 week ago
Share → : Girls be like, “I hate this man,” then have sex with him.
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6 months ago
Share → : If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.
2 weeks ago
Share → : Sometimes I feel like my life is being written by someone who isn’t sure if they like me or not.
2 weeks ago
Share → : Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2447 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,609

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,609

13 minutes ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Leave me alone, man. I’m just living my life like a candle in the wind.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

The only talent I have is spending more than I bring in.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Thank you for the opportunity but I don’t think being human is a good fit for me. I’m going to go back to school to become an octopus.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Shared recently on Threads:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Just shared via Twitch:

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

Trending via Instagram:

Don’t be fooled by what your kids will eat at someone else’s house.

Going viral on Twitch:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Trending via YouTube:

Confidence is 10% work and 90% delusion.

Trending via Instagram:

I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.

Shared recently on Slack:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

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