Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

When this multivitamin kicks in I’m going to do so much success.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

If you ever feel useless, remember that there are bathrooms at pools.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Schrodinger’s Immigrant: A person who is simultaneously too lazy to work, but is also stealing your job.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I’d post more pics, but I don’t want y’all falling in love all at once.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,506

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

The goal is to make your therapist cry.

Spotted on Reddit:

Be the reason your therapist reevaluates their entire career.

Spotted on X:

Being smart is a curse. You see the game, the lies, the patterns, but you still gotta play dumb to survive.

Trending via Telegram:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I do not want to have a career. I want to sit on the porch.

Just landed via Instagram:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

Spotted on Slack:

First rule of cleaning while listening to music: the toilet brush is never the microphone. Never!

Making waves on Facebook:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Going viral on YouTube:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Smile like a monkey with a new banana.

18 hours ago

Playful quote encouraging joy, featuring whimsical words about a monkey and a banana.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Grin from ear to ear like a monkey who just hit the fruit jackpot with a fresh, perfectly ripe banana! 🐵🍌😄 Let that happiness shine through, no matter how silly you may look! Embrace your inner primate and show off that infectious smile!"

banana, expression, happiness, humor, monkey, new, smile

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

77 shares on Telegram this month:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

20 shares on Threads this month:

Have to wear real clothes on Monday. Pray for me.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

54 shares on Pinterest this month:

At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Only people who grew up before the internet will remember these: spelling, grammar and punctuation.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Work beers should be a daily thing.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Might lay here until someone draws my chalk outline.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,403

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Age is just a number that you keep off of Facebook after 35.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I’ve noticed that when young people now talk about “old people”, they mean me.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

Live now on Slack:

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

Shared recently on Discord:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Breaking via Messenger:

Just came back from my walk, and I was right about everything.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Shared recently on Slack:

If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.

Live now on WhatsApp:

They said don’t try this at home, so I’m coming over to your place.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Just saw my evil doppelganger speed away in a DeLorean. I’m sure it’s fine.

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