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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Christmas bonus so small you have to call your bank and ask “is it in yet?”

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Netflix & by yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Adult friendships are like, “hey girl, let’s keep rescheduling to hangout until one of us dies.”

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Dear ads, I have the buying power of a Victorian milkmaid.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I need to get my shit together, but at this point, I’m waiting to see if the world is going to end before I put any real effort in.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I wonder if that football guy will be at the Taylor Swift game again today.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Well, I’ve been depressed and poor, but sure, we’ll call it intermittent fasting.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

The only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,476

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

This Dollar Tree energy drink has me seeing colors that aren’t available to the naked eye, yet.

Trending via Pinterest:

Guys will say, “I know a spot,” and then take you on a downward spiral.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

Freshly posted on Slack:

“I’ll just iron my clothes for work in the morning,” he thought in stupid bachelor.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

No, sorry, next week won’t work. I’ll be a shadow of what I once was.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Just landed via YouTube:

Nobody has ever been given a cheeseburger and been upset about it.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.

Trending via Snapchat:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

Witty quote about men and hugs, humorous and playful message about affection.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, if they're really that deprived of hugs, they might as well start a "Bro Hug Club" 🤗👬 Who needs a significant other when you've got your bros for cuddles, am I right? 😄 #TeamBroHug

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

95 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.

39 shares on X this month:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

74 shares on Messenger this month:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

Young people are too young nowadays. Back in the good old days, young people were my age.

82 shares on X this month:

Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

82 shares on Discord this month:

Meetings are just podcasts I didn’t choose.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

My save-for-later cart on Amazon is up to about $1.5 million dollars.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, aged 20: This is internship summer. I will get an internship. I will find a job. I will study. I will read. I will learn piano. I will… Me, nowadays: This summer, I’m going to try all of the ice cream flavors.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,552

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

I be butt naked, texting people, and they’ll never know.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Laugh all you want. My Encyclopedia Britannica set will never require WiFi.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

An orgy where everyone looks identical is called a doppelgängerbänger.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Brains are awesome. I wish I had one.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Dissecting an alien and getting bitterly jealous at their crazy organs.

Spotted on Telegram:

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

Live now on Snapchat:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Breaking via YouTube:

Being naked with shoes on feels more naked than being totally naked.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

Live now on Slack:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Spotted on Telegram:

The audacity of someone being in the store aisle I want to go down.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Don’t worry, baby, the back pain is because your wings are growing.

Going viral on Slack:

Anyone who thinks being a pessimist isn’t any fun fails to appreciate the joy of saying, ‘I told you so.’

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