Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Remember folks, karma has a fantastic memory and she always collects her debts! 😏💸 Treat others kindly, unless you enjoy being on the receiving end of her payback plan! 🔮😜"

alert, consequences, humor, karma, pay, people, price, relationships, spoiler, treat, treated

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

0

2 months ago

frustration, humor, me, patience, please, PTO, rage, saving, test, warning
According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

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2 months ago

health, humor, little, live, longevity, men, observation, overweight, relationship, study, women
Sundays are weird. You want to relax, but your brain’s like, “Shouldn’t you be panicking about something?”

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2 months ago

anxiety, brain, brains, humor, panic, relax, something, stress, Sunday, want, weekend, weird
My sleep apnea was diagnosed at a staff meeting.

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2 months ago

apnea, diagnosis, health, humor, irony, meeting, sleep, sleep apnea, staff, staff meeting, workplace
I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

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2 months ago

am, another, caffeine, coffee, energy, humor, humor quote, i, morning, sleep, sleeping, standing, tiredness, wakefulness
It’s okay, facial recognition. I don’t recognize myself anymore either.

0

2 months ago

change, facial, facial recognition, humor, i, identity, myself, okay, personal, recognition, self

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Messenger this month:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

39 shares on YouTube this month:

Any room can be a rage room if you just give me a minute.

28 shares on Discord this month:

Girl math is ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.

95 shares on X this month:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

55 shares on Threads this month:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

35 shares on Threads this month:

There are some websites where my password management strategy is to just hit “Forgot my password” every time I need to log in.

39 shares on Reddit this month:

I need to figure out what I’m going to wear to the couch on New Year’s Eve.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

I prefer the Easter Bunny, for starters, he’s not making a list and checking it twice, and more importantly, he’s not watching me when I’m sleeping.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Suffering from a forehead kisses deficiency (self-diagnosed).

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Gender is a just a scam made by big bathroom companies to sell more bathrooms.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Please make sure you are only drinking as much water as you REALLY need. We need that for the data centers. If you’re thirsty, AI is thirsty too.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Cigarettes are a better networking tool than LinkedIn could ever dream of being.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The only squat I’m even considering doing today is diddly.

Making waves on Reddit:

Eating cold ravioli counts as breakfast if you’re still wearing yesterday’s clothes.

Shared recently on YouTube:

If you’re sleep-deprived and type the symptoms into Google, you’re as good as dead.

Making waves on Instagram:

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

Live now on Twitch:

Imagine being a dinosaur. No work or bills. No drama. Just extinct.

Going viral on Telegram:

You can be having the nicest day and then you have to print something and you know your day is about to fall apart real fast.

Just shared via Facebook:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Going viral on Slack:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Just shared via Twitch:

Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Spoiler alert: Eventually you will pay a price for the way you treated people.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

Sundays are weird. You want to relax, but your brain’s like, “Shouldn’t you be panicking about something?”

My sleep apnea was diagnosed at a staff meeting.

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

It’s okay, facial recognition. I don’t recognize myself anymore either.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨