Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I got bills. They’re multiplying.
  • I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.
  • Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.
  • If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.
  • The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.
  • We often come across people in life who make us think: “Oh look, evolution takes a break too!”