Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Ah, the great microwave Olympics of December 26th! 🏆🍿 It's the one day when microwaves around the world get to show off their reheating skills and popcorn-popping prowess. Let the games begin! 🍕🍿🍪 #MicrowaveOlympics

26, bigger, cooking, day, December, December 26, food, holiday, humor, microwave, Olympics

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

1 month ago

card, cards, credit, credit card, finances, humor, i, joke, limit, spending, too
I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

1 month ago

ad, algorithm, clicking, fashion, flannel, flannel shirt, humor, i, identity, Instagram, lumberjack, media, mistake, online, online shopping, shirt, shopping, social, social media
Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

2 months ago

family, food, frustration, give, give in, humor, just, kids, over, parenting, repetition, snack, throw, yelling
Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

1 month ago

curiosity, everyone, gathering, house, humor, invitation, social, social gathering, surprise, tomorrow, want, world
I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

1 month ago

big, cake, celebration, eating, family, friends, groom, humor, i, just, me, self-indulgence, small, solo, want, wedding
Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

1 month ago

ban, fitness, gym, humor, joke, me, sauna, saying, Scotty, steam, times, too, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Everything is about sex except Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about power.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

We need a Disney princess who’s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Trending via Reddit:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Going bananas on Facebook:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Going viral on WeChat:

When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

Shared recently on Threads:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

At least I’m part of the generation that at 30 still looks like it’s in its early 20s.

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I made soup while whispering “He was never mine,” like it’s 1893, and I just lost my beloved to a duel.

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

I’ve got 99 problems. I know this because I wake up in the middle of the night to review each and every one of them in great detail.

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

No, I am not refreshed from my long weekend. I was reminded that I am not meant to work, but I am trapped in The Machine.

Unlike men, women would immediately admit their mistakes if they had any.

If we’re living in a dystopian nightmare, where the hell is my housekeeping robot?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

What a time to be alive! (Derogatory)

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏