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Commentary:
"Imagine a day where you're as energetic as a puppy with a bottomless supply of coffee! ☕️🐶 Perpetual motion, no yawns allowed! Who's in for a 'No-Tiredness Day' movement? 💪😆 #BringOnTheZapGuns"

day, fatigue, humor, invention, rest, should, tired, where, wish

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I think God was high when he made me.

1 month ago
confidence, divine, God, high, humor, humor quote, i, lighthearted, me, quirky, self-deprecating, think
Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

1 month ago
chocolate, dark, dark chocolate, diet, diet joke, eating, food, food humor, healthy, healthy eating, humor, joke, vegetable, vegetables
At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

4 weeks ago
coping, emotional, emotional pain, heal, healing, health, humor, loss, me, memory, memory loss, mental, mental health, only, pain, point, sarcasm, thing
Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

1 month ago
conversations, explanations, good, humor, i, morning, relationship, routine, saying, sleep, straight, wife
Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

1 month ago
boyfriend, dating, even, forever, guy, guys, humor, internet, media, meme, persistence, relationship, reply, reply guy, social, social media, stay
Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

1 month ago
accessory, attitude, communication, fashion, front, got, humor, important, listen, say, shirt, something, style, sunglasses, wardrobe

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

“I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WeChat:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Trending via Slack:

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Just landed via Discord:

All I want for Christmas this year is the housing market to crash, so I could buy a 5-bedroom, 4-bathroom house for $3.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

They should invent a day where you aren’t tired.

I think God was high when he made me.

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.

As a child, all I wanted was as to be a time traveller, like my grandson and his grandson before him.

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

We don’t get a song of the summer this year because we were bad.

I wish rage burned calories. I would be so skinny.

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

People who leave the blinds closed the entire plane ride: who hurt you?

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

I calculated my December budget and realized everyone is getting a hug for Christmas.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Don’t give up, keep going. There are still so many disappointments waiting for you.

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

Tidying up usually ends up with you sitting somewhere and playing around with things you found while tidying up.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

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They should invent a day where you aren’t tired.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I think God was high when he made me.

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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