Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Commentary:
“Ah, the classic progression of a night out: from admiring art to considering alternate modes of transportation! 🍸🍸🍸🛹 Who needs a taxi when you’ve got liquid courage and a skateboard waiting for you outside? Just be sure to wear a helmet – safety first, folks! 😄 #SkateboardRide #TipsyThoughts”

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Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • Not to brag but I don’t need alcohol to do something stupid.

    Commentary:
    “Well, who needs alcohol for a little dose of stupidity anyway? Some of us are naturally gifted in that department!”

  • Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

    Commentary:
    “When in doubt, swap meditation for meditation-ication! 😂💊🧘‍♂️”

  • If trees offered Wi-Fi, we would plant more of them. Too bad they only produce this oxygen thing.

    Commentary:
    “If trees had Wi-Fi, we’d have forests full of ‘hotspots’ and ‘root-ming’ networks 🌲📶 But nah, they just keep recycling boring ol’ oxygen like it’s a big deal or something 🌳💨 #SorryMotherNature”

  • Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

    Commentary:
    “Guess we’re lucky if we get a text back without needing a whole search party! 🏰🕵️‍♂️📱😂”

  • Girls want a bad boy to fix. Boys want a good girl to corrupt. Me? I just want a rumbustious monkey as a butler.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the eternal dilemma of romance: bad boys to fix, good girls to corrupt… and then there’s our unconventional friend here, dreaming of a mischievous monkey in a tuxedo bringing him his tea 🐵☕️ Who needs traditional love stories when you can have a rumbustious butler monkey stirring up chaos in the hallway!”

  • Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

    Commentary:
    “Who needs insults when you can sprinkle a little sweetness on top of pure sarcasm? 🍬😏 It’s like giving a backhanded compliment wrapped in a warm hug. 😜😇 Let’s keep ’em guessing with our perfectly blended sincerity and sarcasm – the ultimate playful combo! 🤭💁‍♂️”