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Commentary:
"Looks like our ancestors were living life on the edge! 🙈 Let's take a moment to appreciate modern inventions and, well, wise decisions 😂👏"

ancestor, ancestors, birth, condom, family, gathering, here, humor, joke, life, today

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

0

4 months ago

adore, affection, behavior, bet, cat, feels, funny observation, good, headbutt, i, observation, pet, pet behavior, someone
What age do you learn to cook pasta for one and not for a whole village? Asking for a friend.

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1 month ago

age, asking, cook, cooking, friend, humor, learn, pasta, portion, village, whole
Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

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2 months ago

customer, customers, employee, every, hit, humor, retail, satisfaction, should, stress, tell, used, workplace, year, yearly
In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

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2 months ago

alternate, alternate universe, always, hard, hard way, humor, learning, me, universe
I can’t believe we live in the timeline where we invented a technology to make it so we can never trust a photo or video again.

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3 months ago

again, age, believe, digital, digital age, fake, fake news, i, invention, literacy, live, media, media literacy, never, news, photo, skepticism, technology, timeline, trust, video, where
If you meet me and I’m talking to myself, just keep walking. I’m self-employed and I’m in a meeting with senior management.

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2 months ago

conversation, humor, isolation, just, keep, management, me, meet, meeting, myself, self-employed, senior, talking, walking, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on WeChat this month:

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

The introverted urge to spend a week alone at home after many holidays and family gatherings.

76 shares on WeChat this month:

You can never really “own” earbuds. You just have to appreciate the time you had together.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you get hangovers, it’s because you drank the beers with impure intentions and heavy karmic debt.

79 shares on X this month:

You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

56 shares on WeChat this month:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

100 shares on YouTube this month:

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

85 shares on WeChat this month:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

84 shares on TikTok this month:

Reverse cowgirl because you made me mad, and I can’t even look at you right now.

37 shares on Snapchat this month:

Maybe Monday is more scared of us than we are of it… we don’t know.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Totally unrealistic movie title: “The Postman Always Rings Twice”. We all know that these guys only ring once and then leave.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I’m a single issue voter. I’m single and it’s an issue.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

They say “When you snooze, you lose”… I say “When you take a nappy, you are happy.”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Adults should get spring break from their jobs.

Going viral on Facebook:

I always make sure the garage door is shut. Wouldn’t want hoodlums stealing the stuff I’ve been meaning to get rid of for years.

Just shared via Facebook:

I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. Y’all just happen to be there.

Making waves on Discord:

There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair.

Just landed via Telegram:

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Hey girl, are you a cigarette? Because I like cigarettes.

Just shared via Instagram:

Be the reason why your local woods are haunted.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Hopefully it won’t be as bad as it already is.

Shared recently on Threads:

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

What age do you learn to cook pasta for one and not for a whole village? Asking for a friend.

Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

I can’t believe we live in the timeline where we invented a technology to make it so we can never trust a photo or video again.

If you meet me and I’m talking to myself, just keep walking. I’m self-employed and I’m in a meeting with senior management.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨