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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Today, I changed a light bulb and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry, guys. Together we can eliminate logic and reason on social media. I see some of you are already ahead of the game. Way to go!

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Life update: it’s getting worse.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I’m still tired from yesterday’s tired.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Just shared via YouTube:

Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.

Trending via Twitch:

People who get 0-5 likes at max and still tweet all the time… What’s your secret?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Breaking via YouTube:

I hope some dyslexic people don’t mail Satan instead of Santa.

Just shared via WeChat:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Just shared via TikTok:

I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

Spotted on YouTube:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about reacting adorably to squirrels with humorous enthusiasm.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the majestic squirrel, nature's adorable acrobat! 🐿️ One glimpse and suddenly we turn into big mushy balls of 'aww'! 😍 Who can resist those bushy tails and their nutty antics? Life's just a little brighter with our furry little friends around! 🌰"

animal, awww, cute, cute animal, humor, nature, observation, reaction, say, squirrel, wildlife

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on Messenger this month:

Curly fries are my favorite as they’re salty and spiraling, like me.

35 shares on Discord this month:

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

Haven’t seen a single bikini photoshoot in the snow this year; the girls are tired.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

I visited my doctor today. He told me my sugar was too high. So I came home and moved it to a lower shelf.

14 shares on X this month:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

86 shares on Slack this month:

My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

70 shares on Slack this month:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Tech bros are frequently wrong but never in doubt.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody views your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone talks about climate change, but no one has the courage to sacrifice a virgin to appease the gods.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Luckily, I realized that all this love I want to pour into someone else was actually meant for me.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Making a cult with only intuitive introverts so we can all sit in silence, side-eyeing each other suspiciously.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Losing a white tee to a stain is a different kind of grief.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

The older I get, the more I understand why deer run in front of cars.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Going viral on Instagram:

According to my Spotify Wrapped, I am what got played the most this year.

Just landed via Discord:

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

You should leave your comfort zone and come to mine instead.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I would like even faster food.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

Breaking via Twitch:

Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.

Spotted on Twitch:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

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