Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My son is teaching himself Christmas songs on the trumpet, proving things can be both beautiful and annoying.
  • When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.
  • Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.
  • Why did they call it long distance running and not fardio?
  • Netflix & by yourself.
  • When I find it, I don’t need it. When I need it, I can’t find it.