Wordgag 🎅

Commentary:
"Oh, I see the struggle of finding the perfect companion continues 😜🕰️ Maybe they're lost in a time warp or hiding in a parallel universe! Keep searching, you never know where your 'missing piece' might be hiding! 🌌🔍"

back, date, funny remark, humor, irony, life, relationship, remark, sarcasm, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

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2 months ago

better, clinic, humor, joke, mayo, place, sandwich, sick, sounds, still, wordplay
You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

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2 months ago

adulthood, cost, dental, dental visit, dentist, expenses, fear, humor, know, mature, maturity, pain, visit
Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

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2 months ago

40s, aging, camera, changes, eyes, focus, humor, know, life, life changes, perception, someone, welcome
Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

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4 months ago

doing, driving, frustration, green, humor, joke, patience, sat, sign, stop, stop sign, today, traffic, turn, waiting, wondering
I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

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2 months ago

church, confession, guilt, humor, i, irony, joke, name, relationship, want
Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

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2 months ago

digestive, full, health, help, humor, joke, laxatif, live, pooptential

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Slack this month:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

73 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Having a job is crazy. When you’re at home, you feel lonely and want to go to work. When you’re at work, you’re exhausted and just want to go home.

87 shares on TikTok this month:

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Hi there, I very much look forward to letting you down.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Offering friendship as a consolation prize for a failed romantic connection attempt is absolutely cruel.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

If I were a bird, you’d be the first person I’d shit on.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Trending via Snapchat:

A middle finger hits different when your nails are done.

Spotted on Discord:

A guy in the parking lot saw me trip over my own feet so I yelled to him “I just quantum leaped into this body!”

Going bananas on YouTube:

Dear everyone. Upset, bored, angry or hungry. I’m here for you. Sincerely, fridge.

Making waves on Slack:

Some 100 private jets will fly to Venice for Jeff Bezos’ wedding, and I recycle yoghurt cup lids.

Making waves on TikTok:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Roman soldiers are all like “I’m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.”

Just shared via Threads:

Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨