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Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

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First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

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It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

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I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

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So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

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“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

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Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

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User: the word computer professionals use when they mean ‘idiot.’

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That awkward moment when you spend an hour online picking out a gift for your friend’s son’s birthday and Amazon tells you it’s been a year since you bought this item.

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The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.