Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.
  • Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.
  • If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.
  • Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference.
  • Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.
  • Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?