Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?
  • Looking for someone to take to couples therapy and see how long it takes the therapist to notice we don’t know each other.
  • If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.
  • It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.
  • How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.
  • I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?