Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I wish you could put your whole life on do not disturb.
  • The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.
  • Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.
  • I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.
  • I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.
  • So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.