Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I only accept apologies in cash.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

The first sin in the Bible was eating an apple. The second was murder. That escalated quickly.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.