“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Nowadays you don’t even have to go to the zoo. A trip to the mall is enough.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Starting an OnlyFans, but it’s just videos of me trying to use chopsticks.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

First responders? You mean reply guys?