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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

For a long time, I didn’t know what to do with my strange thoughts. Then I signed up for Facebook.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

My youngest had a mandatory drugs and alcohol lecture today at school, and he still can’t mix a proper drink.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

It’s important to set an alarm the first day of school, so you remember to pick up the kids.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

How do I get someone to unknow me? I no longer want to be known by these people.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Exercise gives you energy, but you need energy to exercise. Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2488 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,650

Funny Quotes Topics

15,327

Funny Quotes Images

12,650

2 minutes ago

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

That was pointless, we could’ve just stayed strangers.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Breaking via YouTube:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Just landed via X:

Drive like no one is watching.

Breaking via Threads:

I don’t need therapy, I need a bagel with cream cheese.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

5 months ago

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the majestic relationship, just like a shark – impressive from a distance, but up close, you realize it's not all smooth sailing and dreamy music playing in the background. So, maybe it's best to enjoy your relationships like you do with sharks – from a safe distance and through the lens of a screen!"

comparison, entertainment, humor, love, relationship, shark, TV

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2488 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,650

Funny Quotes Topics

15,327

Funny Quotes Images

12,650

2 minutes ago

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

“Overdressed” is a social construct created by hating girls.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Everyone thinks they’re a badass until seaweed brushes their leg.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I never learned to swim because I didn’t think it would ever be more than an hour since I last ate.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Work for a living? In this economy?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Spotted on Facebook:

My mom and all her opinions are visiting this weekend.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Spotted on Instagram:

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

Just shared via Telegram:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Trending via Discord:

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

Going viral on WeChat:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Just landed via Slack:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I don’t want to party like it’s 1999, I want to go grocery shopping like it is.

Reported on Reddit:

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

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