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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Lie during your job interview because they’re lying to you about their great work environment.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

54 minutes ago

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

It sucks that crazy people ruined wearing tinfoil hats for those of us that just did it for fashion purposes.

Live now on TikTok:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Spotted on X:

So. Fed the laundry and washed the cat. Showered the garbage and disposed of myself. Was there anything else?

Going viral on Reddit:

Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

Just landed via Reddit:

I couldn’t work at a zoo. I’d have a penguin in my car by the end of the shift.

Trending via Threads:

Is everything expensive or am I just poor?

Seen just now on Threads:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

God: “I told you to love thy neighbor – not start trade wars with them.”

Just landed via Twitch:

I just want to be treated like a hot little French fry.

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

6 months ago

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like the web developer is keen on expanding their search query optimization skills everywhere they go! 🕵️‍♂️🔍 Meanwhile, the SEO expert is probably already eyeing up the bar's meta tags and keyword density for a potential improvement project. 🍻💻 Cheers to a night of optimizing and imbibing in equal measure! 🍹💻🚀

alcohol, area, bar, beer, developer, drink, drinking, drinks, expert, humor, nightclub, nightlife, place, place to drink, places, pub, seo, SEO expert, tavern, walk, web, web developer

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

54 minutes ago

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn’t come back, what you lost was a normal pigeon.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Sometimes I see how many vacations people take and I wonder if I’m bad with money or if they are.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

My kids are smart but sometimes they say dumb stuff like, “Mom, why do you always buy Snickers when you’re the only one who likes them?”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m a Leo so I just eat the other astrological signs.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Making waves on WeChat:

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Making waves on YouTube:

Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Shared recently on Facebook:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Just landed via Facebook:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Nobody will know you’re stoned if you’re always stoned.

Spotted on X:

Never feel bad when people roll their eyes while you talk to them. They’re just looking for their brain.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Really just want to meet someone who knows what songs not to talk over.

Breaking via Reddit:

The struggle to get off the couch and into bed is real.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

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