Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.
  • She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations.
  • Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.
  • Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.
  • What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”
  • I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.