Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Commentary:
“Looks like someone’s really toe-tally committed to making a connection! Watch out, love might just be lurking around the coffee table.”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs to snoop through phones when you can just dream up all the juicy details instead? 🤔💭 Sweet dreams or nightmare fuel, ladies? 😂📱 #DreamsDontLie”

  • If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like Mother Nature can’t decide between winter and spring, but hey, why not enjoy the holiday spirit all year round? 🎄❄️ Who needs a Christmas in July when you can have Christmas in March? 🤣 #MotherNatureMakeUpYourMind”

  • Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

    Commentary:
    “Let’s all push for a world where ‘better you than me’ becomes the ultimate compassion phrase for chronic complainers. 🙃 It’s the polite way of saying ‘I don’t have time for your drama, but thanks for the entertainment!’ 😂 #NormalizeBetterYouThanMe”

  • When is this robot army coming to take my job?

    Commentary:
    Don’t worry, the robot army is just running a little behind schedule 🤖⏰ Don’t stress, you’ve still got some time to enjoy being the reigning champ in your domain! 😄🏆

  • Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

    Commentary:
    “Trying to decipher today’s slang is like trying to solve a cryptic puzzle designed by aliens 👽. You’re not alone in feeling lost in this linguistic maze! It’s a wild ride in the world of Gen Z lingo 🤯🤔 #LostInTranslation”

  • Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the classic reverse psychology at play! 🙈 It’s like giving a kid a challenge they just can’t resist. Don’t touch that, they said. But now it’s like a neon sign saying “Touch Me!” Kids are sneaky little rebels, aren’t they? 😂 #CuriosityWins